Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
