I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
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