Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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