JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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