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• (972): View more from Texas

  Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.

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• (310): View more from California

  Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?

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• (818): View more from California

  Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.

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• (818): View more from California

  Hahah what did you even say to him?!

  (805): View more from California

  That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?

  (818): View more from California

  Oh.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could

  (1306): View more from

  well, that escalated quicky

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?

  (1-618): View more from Illinois

  Proceed with caution.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?

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