Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We left the knife in your bed.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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