Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize