I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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