so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
