After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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