i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
