butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
