Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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