Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
