I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
is wine microwaveable?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Randomize
