I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm like, not good at living.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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