she takes plan B like it's going out of style
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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