Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I did not marry a roomba.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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