she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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