I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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