Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Just pee around me
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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