That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
