How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
