Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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