I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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