dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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