I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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