Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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