BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
