Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
