Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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