That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
