the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Can't talk, ducks in the car
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
