Sry I called you an 8
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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