More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Randomize
