We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
