I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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