She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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