There is no way he is gay with that hair.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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