I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
