so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize