she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
