when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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