i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
