we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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