Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize