It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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