we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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