if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize