Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
